Mourning

I have 3 horses, 2 dogs, 2 turtles, and 2 cats. I think. Emmie has been AWOL since last weekend. I heard cats screaming last week. Now she is gone. I fear she has been run off by the bigger, meaner kitties. I fear I have a bobcat. I fear she has met an early end. She had not left the vicinity since moving here.

Last night, I heard screaming and went out to scream at Pumpkin. I found Blue at the door wanting in really bad and Punk in the back yard sitting peacefully. No mad cats. No strange cats. No Emmie. My thought then was bobcat. Who knows?

Emmie is a plain, black cat. She is aloof, shy. She does not seek out human attention. I am the only person that can touch her. This is a nice way of saying wild. Crazy wild. Out of 10 pets, she is the least committed. I wish I knew what happened. I have this feeling that she is gone. I hope she felt unwanted by the other cats and went next door. I hope she comes home. She left for days at the old house. She just never left here. I still have hope. I go outside a dozen times a day hoping to see her. And every time I come back with renewed sadness. She's just a wild cat. I miss her terribly. How do we get so attached? I have 10...or 9 pets. How does it hurt so bad for every one? If she is gone I would like to bury her and plant something. Just to know what happened...